Well, I've got the kids off to school. I always say, "Well, now I need to get to work". I say this everyday when I get home from taking the kids to school and you know what I do? I almost always get on here. That's not working!!
In case you haven't figured it out yet, I HATE housework. When asked if I work or if I'm a housewife, DH always replies, "No, she's stay at home mom." It's completely different from being a housewife. I wish I was a better one. I wish my house always shined and glistened but... instead there is usually a lot dust and clutter. This is always a goal of mine. To get myself together and get busy with my housework. I need a schedule.
I get a newsletter about once a month called, "Tea With Dee". This last one she was talking about this very subject. She said she read somewhere that we should think of housework as a way of loving our family not as work. I'm trying to think this way but I guess I'm just lazy. I try to think of it as bringing peace to my home and family and I do good for a day or two sometimes even a week but once the family is home for more than a couple of hours together... well, it's usually a disaster area! DD's bedroom is horrible right now and I think that's why I'm not getting started because I know that I need to go there right away and I need to straighten up the kitchen first. I can't seem to work anywhere until the kitchen is straight. I wish I could keep it under control then maybe the rest would get done but I wouldn't count on it.
I can't believe that I'm saying this on here. I sound terrible but... Okay, I guess I better go get busy loving my family!! ;)
Who is this Dee person? What a guilt trip. In psychology, channeling one thing into something unrelated is called transference. Trust me if I clean this house all day, then I won't have anything left for the family.*****(The above is known as rationalizing) ;)
ReplyDeleteThus ends Psychology 101.
Well, Dee didn't say it. She said she read it somewhere. She just thought it was a nice thought. I hadn't thought about it your way though and this is true! Thanks for the pick me up! ;)
ReplyDeleteYou'll have to forgive me because I'm in the "was a young girl during women's liberation" category. I still remember what it was like before. I don't embrace all of the ideas that came out of that movement, but I think I learned to base my self-worth on a different set of criteria. (And I'm pretty sure you did too.) Housework is important, but, I think that it's a mistake to confuse it with loving your family. If you try to measure your love for your family by how clean you keep your house, you are always going to come up short. I think the answer lies in choices and being realistic. Sure you can constantly pick-up after your children, but in the end, your daughter is going to remember that you played Candyland with her.
ReplyDeleteOn a more helpful note....try breaking up your chores into manageable work units and scheduling them on certain days. Don't say, "This week I'm cleaning the kitchen and doing the laundry." Instead say, "Monday I'm washing the sheets and the towels then clearing off the kitchen counters....etc." Then when you are done with the stuff on your schedule...you are done. Okay....except for dinner and such. The important part of this is that you schedule it. Don't follow someone else's schedule. Some people are fast and some people enjoy housework because it clears their mind. None of those people are me. Anyway, it's worth a try.
ReplyDeleteI try to do that with the schedule. I stick with it for a while but then.... That's okay. When I said that I was going to try to think of it as loving my family instead of work, I was hoping it would seem less like work that way not as measure though. Hadn't even thought of like that. It was more for motivation. My house is usually more cluttered than dirty. It's very lived in at all times.
ReplyDeleteNo, I didn't think you were going to measure yourself by it. And I know exactly where you are coming from on the motivation issue. It's one of my quirks that I analyze things to death. But, I'm not going to do it anymore here because it's not really helpful. Just rest assured that my responses were more about me than they were about you. That's the hard part about the written word. It's really easy to sound harsh when that wasn't my intention at all. I was responding to the idea in general and not specifically to you. Except to say that your kids will remember that you spent time with them.
ReplyDeleteYou are more than welcome to analyze here anytime! At least I know one person is here reading. hehe I wasn't worried about your responses. Just having a conversation and you are always a help to me!!! I agree with what you were saying. It just hadn't occured to me to look at it that way. Anyway, it's pretty funny that I even brought this up since I'm really pretty lazy and don't even try much with the housework. I guess I'd much rather write here about it then do it!!! hehehehe. Anyway, you analyze here anytime!! I mean it!!!
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