Thursday, March 01, 2012

Here we go again...

Well, here I am again.  Getting up early to see if I might catch DH on the computer before he goes to bed and staying up late to see if I might catch him as he comes in from work.  I told myself this was over.  I wasn't going to do this anymore, but here I am.  Checking my email 100 times an hour to see if maybe by some chance he had a quick moment to email during his day.

I had decided a while back with all DH's TDYs that I wouldn't let myself do this.  That I would keep on doing what usually do, you know, just keep living and yet, this time I'm finding myself attached to the computer clicking refresh hoping for something more. 

It's crazy.  Really it is.  He's not deployed just TDY.  He's not in harms way, just far away.  This is actually how it was early in our marriage.  Well, except back them we didn't have a computer or a cell phone.  I would sit around the house waiting for a phone call... I wouldn't leave the house for fear I'd miss his call.  Like I said crazy.  At least now, when he is TDY in the states I can take my cell phone with me and he can call me on it. 

But he's not stateside so the computer is all I have and it seems to be attached to me once again.  It's not a good thing for me or for our relationship. I end up getting upset and feeling down and lonely and wondering why he hasn't skyped or emailed or facebooked...  Well, duh, because he is working or sleeping!  Silly, silly girl.  Get up!  Get busy!  Live life!  He'll love you for it.  He doesn't want you to be upset, down or lonely (well, maybe a little lonely for him :o).  He wants you to miss him of course but he also wants you to be happy.  He wants you to get your sleep so you are well rested when he gets home. So, here I go!  Shopping trip, I am ready!  DD and Dear Friend, Let's GO!


  1. All to familiar, when my son was deployed in Iraq, I was worried I miss a call from him. Quick runs to the store, Christmas was another issue all together. My Parents wanted me to spend time at thier house. I choose not too, and glad that I stayed home. My son called Christmas day and to celebrate the occasion it started to snow : )

  2. I know just what you mean. When my husband deploys I won't go anywhere for the holidays or really anytime. If I can't be home at night I don't go. I can't imagine my son being over there.

  3. You love him, you miss him... Give yourself permisson to do the later because of the former... I think it's sweet, and as long as you are still doing what you need to as a mom, who cares?? (But of course go shopping!)

  4. Yep, I do want you to get rested for when I come home! Please don't tie yourself down for me... I need you to be living for us and for our kids. GO HAVE FUN!