A hard question for me...

I've just been thinking about a question I hear a lot of. "How are you, really?" There's nothing wrong with the question and actually it shows that people care about me and I like it. But it is a hard question for me. My answer is usually the same. "I'm fine, really." But you know, it's really a deep question and I never have the words to answer it.

My usual answer is an honest one. But there is more to it. I am fine. Really, I am. But it's because I really have no other choice but to be fine. You know what I mean? But when I really think about it there's more.

Even now, it's hard to say. I'm sad but I'm not sad. I'm sometimes angry but not angry. It's so hard to describe. I miss my husband terribly. Sometimes I just feel like my heart is breaking. But to be honest... because of the kids, I really don't have time to think about it and I try not to think about it.

I ask my DH this question at least once a week and he never really answers it either. We both have our standard answers. His, "I'm fine, just tired." I know there's more to it but it's really a hard question.

Anyway, I've been asked this twice now in the last 24 hours and so my answer is this...

Thank you so much for asking. I'm fine, really. We are managing. I miss DH terribly but I hear from regularly and that helps. We'll get by, we are 3 months down now. Only 9 more to go. Thanks again for asking....