Confessions

First let me say that I love to cook. I always have. I'm not a spectacular cook but I'm definitely not a bad cook.

Now for the confession... I am the queen of eating out!! It's terrible! I know. We eat out all the time and it is almost always JUNK FOOD!! I know... I'm so ashamed.

But! I've been trying to fix it lately. We've been eating at home a lot lately and I am so very glad. We've not been eating the best but it's been better.

Today we did awesome! We ate breakfast. It was descent. Lunch was wonderful. I almost broke and went out once again but thankfully I didn't. We had french toast and it was great!! And I don't mean store bought french toast sticks, I mean I put the bread in the egg mixture and everything!

Oh, I forgot to mention that my children are the most pickiest eaters alive! So when they ate the french toast and liked it and even raved over and said that we need have it really often, I nearly fainted! With the french toast we had bacon, clementines and milk.

Then for supper we had turkey smoked sausage, green beans (my neighbor canned some gave me some), and a potato dish we love. The kids cleaned their plates!! I wish they would more often. Maybe we are on a new road to eating well.

I've been trying forever to get us on that road. It doesn't help that none of us like veggies. I'm probably the worst about it but I'm learning. I've really been trying hard to learn to eat them and cook them. But at least we are eating at home again and if nothing else saving a little money.

So I'm still working on it and hopefully we will continue our new road.

Hello dear cyber friends,

Oh, we've had a beautiful day today. It seems kind of funny to say so but it has been. It has rained all day but it has been so nice. I've had the doors open all day letting the fresh air in and I just love the smell of rain.

The kids spent a huge portion of the day outside playing the puddles in their rain jackets with umbrellas.

We even cooked out on the grill on our covered porch! It's just been beautiful.

I spent a lot of the day reading about being "green". There is much to learn. I've always tried to be but it's not often easy and it can be rather expensive so... but I'm going to try to do better. If you have any suggestions please let me know them!!

When the kids came in after dinner they put up the card table in the living and played a board game. It seems like it was a perfect day! I didn't get much done (as usual) but it was still a wonderful day. I hope you all enjoyed yours.

Dreams?

What are yours? Dreams are a funny thing. They change often but do they really? I think we move them over sometimes for other dreams but I'm not sure they really change.

Why is it that some people set their dreams aside... OH!!! I just a moment... I think when I started typing this I was feeling a little like George Bailey.

You know, he kept putting off his dream for his family, first his father, then his brother, and the he just seemed to be stuck. In the end he realized he really had everything he needed and wanted.

So... I guess I should just let this go for now... I know that I have everything, it just seems like something is missing but it's probably all in mind so never mind.

How about you share your dreams!

Well, let's see... where to begin.... we've been busy but at the same time lazy. Is that possible? Hmm.... Anyway, I have lots of catching up to do around the house and I should be doing that now, not typing on here but.... we all know how feel about housework...

DS cleaned the living room yesterday but it needs tiding up again. The kitchen always needs my attention. It's our catch all room. I know, it should be just a table, or a counter or something but no, we have a catch all ROOM. I'm working on it.

I've been a little preoccupied with the news lately. Can believe what all is going on in our world? It's crazy. I do feel a little upset that we can't get a cease-fire and then work on disarming Hezbollah but...

I hate seeing all the destruction on both sides. I can't bear it when they show the civilians standing on the sidewalk in awe and shock crying. It just breaks my heart. When they start showing that I have to turn the channel because I start crying so hard.

I hate war. There is nothing good about it. It tears families apart. It destroys so very much and so much is lost that can never be brought back. It's a truly terrible thing. I hate it even more that wars seem to be a religious thing so often and that just seems so... backwards to me. Not at all what God would want from us. It leaves me feeling so lost and angry and yes, even a little confused.

I had the news on for minute last night at bedtime and there was a Congressman on that was talking about all this and as he said that the head of Hezbollah was killed he smiled and seem almost deliriously happy. That made me so very sad. I was actually shocked, even though I should be used to it by now.

But I don't think we should ever be happy to hear of someone's death, no matter who they are! I know this person was not what we would call a good person but... I don't know I just don't believe that we are supposed to kill. I know in war that happens but should we really be HAPPY about it? Shouldn't we be sad for them? Sad that they had done such terrible things before they died? Sad that we weren't able to help this person? Sad?

See my confusion? It's a very frustrating thing for me. Even as I was typing it I was having a very hard time with it. I guess I'm more upset about the fact that this Congressman was happy about the death than the actual death because in war death is inevitable but I don't think we should be happy it, at least not so very openly. (No, we should be happy about it.)

Wow, sorry if I got deep on you there. It happens from time to time. Not usually on here... but it was probably due to happen eventually.

Well, I'm going to leave the war for a while and listen to some music and work around the house a bit. Have a good day!

Goddess Swap!!

Oh, I just opened my front door and look what I found!



How very exciting!! It's my package from the Goddess Swap from Leanne over at Roman Holiday!! DD didn't think I was opening it fast enough!



I received a a lovely card from my new friend Leanne, a SPA reflections CD, a bar of Mississippi Moon Naturals soap (Lavender and rosemary scented), Hand and Cuticle Salve, Organic Body wash and lotion from the healing garden (fig and lavender scented and it smells wonderful!!!).


Oh, and I had been needing a box this size for a while now and just kept putting it off so now I have one and I can't wait to go and decorate it! Thank you so much, Leanne!! I appreciate it. I hope you enjoy yours when it gets there. I mailed it yesterday. I should have sent organic, sorry. I didn't even think about it. DD was helping me pick it all out. Keep that in mind!! ;o) Thank you!!

And thank you to ms*robyn over at Simply Being In This Life for setting up the swap! It's so fun!!

I can't wait to go pamper myself!

I just have not been getting any thing done lately. I've not been getting my blogging done, nor my journalling, nor my letter writing. What is going on with me!!

Well, actually it's DD. She is keeping my soooo busy. It's been nice though and lots of fun. So... the neglecting will continue for a while longer. I'm still here just too busy having fun with my kids.

I'll be back soon. Tell me... what have you all been up to?

Have you ever had an epiphany? I mean just a sudden realization that something was just very important to you? Not important like God or family but still something that is a part of you. A part of your heart, something deep in your soul that almost defines you. Something that maybe you have only partially let out.

Well, yes, I've had one. It's music. I absolutely love music and if I am completely honest, it is something that defines me. The sad part is that I barely let this side of me out. I sing at church but not in choir. I sing around the house always but if someone is around I sing much more quietly or not at all (I don't want to bother them). I love to hear beautiful music. I love to be apart of it! I love to make it. It is one my most absolute favorite things in this world! I think it is a true gift for us all to enjoy.

The problem, is that I don't let it out enough. I've passed it on to my children. Mainly my daughter. She loves to sing and does so almost continually. My son had it for a while but I'm afraid that I've also passed on to him the ... holding it deep inside. If he doesn't think anyone is around he can sing but... not if anyone is listening.

I don't sing in the choir at church because I love sitting with my family during worship and am not willing to give it up. I've filled out the little forms, you know the ones asking how you'd like to serve in church. I've always marked that I'd like to help with special music but no one ever asks. It doesn't help that I'm shy. In some ways incredibly.

I would love to take piano lessons but one... it would cost and I hate to spend money on just me and two it would take me away from the family for that time. I don't often, if ever, take time for myself. That is mostly my fault but when DH is deployed or TDY or in the field or just gone where ever, it is very hard to take time for me.

When I was in high school, I wanted to take drama so bad, I wanted to be in a musical so bad it hurt! But... You can only take so many classes and I was on the road to college and it just wasn't feasible. I did take choir and I loved it. I was very shy though and I doubt if anyone even knew I was there.

I remember my senior year, I had been in choir all 3 years I had lived there, and we were trying out for a solo. I couldn't believe it when Mr. Cowan (the director) asked if anyone else wanted to try out and I raised my hand!! I can remember that when I started to sing, the room got completely quiet and people asked who I was. It was even the very end of the school year! I could hear people asking when I joined the choir because they had never seen me before!

No, I didn't get the solo, it was really a joke that they even let anyone else try because the same person ALWAYS got the solos, every single year, every single time. I honestly wasn't even disappointed because I knew it would be like that.

Then in college, my dad (the preacher) had the bright idea of me singing a solo. No big deal, I had been doing it for years! BUT this time it just so happened that it was on the same Sunday that the choir from the college I attended was performing too. You know, people who were music majors, who were real singers and musicians. UNREAL!! I was so nervous but despite the shaking it turned out wonderful and the head of the music department asked me to major in music. I didn't but I should have. But I didn't see how I could make a living with that. (really dumb, I'm a stay at home mom! I've not used my Marketing degree in more than 9 years!)

This isn't the first time I've had this epiphany. It happens when I watch certain shows or when I hear a beautiful piece of music or when a song really touches my heart. I'm not saying this because I have the big head and I hope that no one takes it that way. I'm not anything special (my voice and talent are average) but I do love music and wish that I knew how to better use it in my life the way I think God means for me to.

I use it with my kids. I teach them with it. We have always made up silly songs to help us remember things. I've used it in teaching the kids at different churches. I've used it in years past as a way to serve in worship.

But today... I feel like it is always bursting in me trying to get out but... there is no outlet for it. I don't know what to do or how to use it.

The thing is... it is such a part of me and I have no idea where to use it. When I had this "epiphany" tonight I wanted to cry. To cry. To cry because I've not let this out more. To cry because I don't even know where to start!

Of course, I also wanted to jump up and sing my lungs out! To run and sit at the keyboard and work though a piano book and try to improve. But I also wanted to write about all this so that I'd have it for later. To remind myself over and over how very important music is to me. Music... it's the world, it's my heart.

Still here!

We have company in from out of town and are having a wonderful time!! We are getting acquainted with my beautiful niece. This is only the second time we have seen and her. My children are loving her being here! It's so sweet.

I'll be back soon!

Busy today...

That's what we are. We are having company soon so we are busy cleaning house. Yes, I have tied on my apron and am "going to town" on my house!

I even cleaned out the linen closet, and cleaned out under the sink in the kids bathroom. I have them put their towels up and well, they never seem to remain folded so... that is now done.

I cleaned up the "office" area as best I could for now and it is presentable.

I have also cleaned the top of the dryer off and wiped down both the washer and dryer so that it looks better too.

I now need to get busy in my bedroom and bath. I always put it off till because usually no one really goes in there but this time will a different story so.... it's off to work I go... tralalala.

Vintage Housekeeper?

I really wish! But to tell the truth, I'm not really even much of a housekeeper!! I want to be. I really do but I think I have a terrible case of the lazies.

I also have this terrible addiction to this dang computer! See, my idea of housekeeping seems to be READING ABOUT IT!!! I start out with great intentions. I'm just going to get on here to get ideas and suggestions. You know, like schedules, and things to motivate. Then that is all I end up doing!! READING!

I've got to get past this! I've never been a great housekeeper but I used to be much better than I am now. I really do think that I can link it all to when we got the Internet but it's really just me being lazy!

I will say that I do do good for a day or two but then something happens and I miss one day or one thing and then it takes me days or even weeks to get myself together again! (It's the same with exercise.) Oh me... Any suggestions? Other than a maid! hehehe keep them short too so that I won't spend too much time reading them! hehehehe

Curls....

We curled DD's hair last night for the first time with sponge rollers. TOO CUTE!! She loved it and she loved making them bounce when she walks. Here are a couple of pics.



<-- My Princess






What a beauty.
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Happy Birthday, DH!!

We love you!